Basically, university started. You could probably guess that - I do talk about it in several posts. I only had two modules last term; Nationalism, Ethnicity and Race, and The Other in Horror and Science Fiction Films. As I only had to go in to university on a Thursday, I decided to get a job. And signed up for far too many hours (4 days a week essentially). I also started driving lessons, which I had to drop out of in the end due to lack of time. So I felt far too busy to do anything here.
But that's a load of rubbish really. So 2012 Anna?
I'm far busier this term, and yet I actually want to get things done. I want to be productive. And thinking about how little I had to do last term compared with how much I need to do this term? I could have easily kept this updated. I spent far too long doing nothing.
So I think a quick update is needed to go through the things I have to do over the next few months and the things I want to do. I've been thinking about these and making numerous lists here and there, but it's probably good to write it down and get it out of the way.
First of all, I'm still at university. This is the final term of my final year. That means in less than half a year, I'm going to be let loose on the world. I need a plan. I don't really have a plan. I mean, I have a vague plan, but it's not very well thought out. I've applied for an MPhil in Screen Media and Cultures but there's a very slim chance of me actually getting on the course (I'm not sure how wonderful the sample of my writing I submitted was, but it's the only thing I had suitable to submit). My other plan was to apply for the BBC's PTP if I didn't get onto the Masters, but I'm no where near suitable for it. Not just yet. Hence me trying to get myself in gear.
University-wise, I'm taking three modules this term and I also have to work on my dissertation. My modules are in Anthropology and Psychiatry, Science Society and Biomedicine, and Advanced Topics in Digital Cultures. There's so much work to do! Digital has set us an ethnography a week to read, precisely because we never have to read whole books any more. So that's a 250-300 page book to read each week - fine if it were fiction, but it's anthropology. That makes it instantly harder to read, and takes me about 4 times longer. I'm actually meant to be reading this week's book now, but I figured I'd do this first (I have the whole day today to do it! I nearly got the last one read in a day and I've given myself three for this one). I still have to finish last week's book, although I'm under two chapters from the end. Then there's the usual readings for the other two modules, and my dissertation.
Oh my dissertation. I'm actually dreading it. I had to write a draft chapter for last Monday, and it didn't go wonderfully. I couldn't do the whole 10 pages we were meant to write, I only did 8. I really need to talk to my supervisor about it, but he's not answering any of my emails! The other students who've got him said they've had the same problem, but one said she managed to catch him by turning up in his office hours. I have 30 minutes during which I could turn up at his office hours because I have classes that day. I suppose I could go and organise another meeting. That might be best.
What struck me when writing the chapter and the bibliography was how much I have to read. I have no idea how I'm going to get it all done, not with everything else I have to read as well. It's going to be a nightmare. But I'll push through. That's part of why I'm setting everything out like this - I've spent the last two weeks trying to get back on track of things so I can be more organised. It's not going too badly! In fact,
So what else? In general life-improvement we have a continuation of things started last year. I'm trying to get healthier, so I'm attempting to do some yoga every day. Food-wise I already eat pretty healthy if I stay away from the takeaways. Except today's breakfast was far too fatty. I shouldn't have used L's pan after her, she uses far more oil than necessary in my opinion. Made the eggs in baskets far too greasy. But yes, yoga. And I've started meditation - only three minutes a day for now, but every little helps? My mind also decided last night that I need to finally finish a piece of fanfic I started over a year ago, so posted it on AO3. That was a clever idea. Not. Now I actually feel like I need to work on it.
But all of that aside, I need to focus on and think about improving my career prospects. That's such a horrible phrase. But I need to start working on things now to show that I can do things, I'm creative, I'm organised etc, and that I'm suitable for the PTP or whatever I end up actually applying for! H keeps saying she wants to make short films, which I've said I'll help her with, but she never does anything about them. So we're ignoring all of that for now.
J and I discussed over Christmas making a series of videos where we talk about things like films, books, TV, anything that interests us. It'll help us keep in touch more, and we both want experience making things. But I'm a little weary - he's starting. Will he actually make one? I really need to Skype him today, the first video is meant to be up soon. It'd mean I have to make a video every other week for now, which is a schedule I think I can stick to. I just need him to stick to it as well.
I know that when I'm creative, I feel like being more creative. So my hope is that if I keep that up, I'll want to do more things of a similar nature. Might work on some of my writing projects, make a short film, just do anything to be more productive! I was going to start going to the radio drama meetings this term, and I still am, but I missed the first one. I'm so annoyed. I really want to get involved in that.
And I suppose I need to get this blog running again. That sounds like I don't really want to. I do! I've been missing it for months. I need to keep a project going and complete something. I don't do that any more. But at the moment, I feel like if I don't get on the PTP or on any work experience placements (got rejected from one today) then it'll be because I'm not suitable. I've not done anything to show that I'd be a good candidate, even though I know that I would be if I got on with things. I want to spend the next few months working on a variety of things so that if I apply and still get rejected, then at least I'll know I tried my best.
Sometimes I think I don't try things because I don't want to fail. But if I never try, then I'm guaranteed to fail. Why can't my brain process that?
Less diary-ish service will resume at some point soon. I've got anthropological things I need to think about!
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